99% is not 100% ...

Do you know sometimes I struggle with "ya i know! really! ... ... ...  but i need to be 100% sure!"? I'm not a risk taker.

It's like everyone who has tried a new handphone tells you it's the best phone ever but you still want to go to the internet and search for the specifications before you sure it's the phone you want.

Ok, that was a lousy example. 2nd try...

When I'm studying, I might come across a sentence which reminds me of another fact, for eg. fact A. I'm pretty sure it's correct, but i still wanna flip the books and find the exact sentence that tells me I'm absolutely right about fact A.

Sometimes knowing is not enough for me... I want to be sure. They're not quite different but not totally the same as well, for me.

This becomes particularly disastrous when it happens in situations such as  "Ya I know you meant something good (by doing/saying that just now).... but, hm... can I just make sure? To be sure that I'm right about thinking you meant it good?" 

I know it takes a lot of patience to endure being doubted by someone you hope/expect to have known you enough to trust you... until that someone finally learn to trust, one day >.< 

I think I'm the kind of person who wants things to be REALLY clear.. meaning I don't normally classify 99% as a fact. I realize I use a lot of "maybe", "probably", "I guess" and "I think so" in my conversations. Most of the time I know that what I'm saying is 99% true, but I just want to leave a bit of space for any turn of events or possibility of me being wrong (the remaining 1%). If it's possible I normally would prefer a straight-forward discussion for any existing question rather than settling with assumptions (even good assumptions...) because assumptions can never be 100% =p

*copy and paste from a friend because it's too difficult to find words to describe such weird personality =p* u want clarification and clear cut decisions that will give u clear cut results or rather commitment... a straight to the point person? but yet still have room as u r a thinker?

I wrote this confusing blog post sincerely hoping that anyone who might have become a victim of my recurrent (and-almost-always-proven-wrong-later) doubts would find the strength to forgive me and pray that I will learn to trust my true friends correctly and more importantly, to trust God completely. =D